Small Time
by JMK758
Summary: Sequel to 'Glistni'. Tia Anlor is starting to adjust to her life aboard Enterprise, but it is her Auran nature that complicates her adjustment.
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: Paramount owns everything except Lt. Seamus O'Cathain (O'Ca-tain) and Tia Anlor (Ahn-lore). As I have said in 'Casting Call', 'Golden Girl', 'A Few Words', 'Glistni', they belong to me.

Perspective: This story takes place about ten days after 'Glistni', thus being the end of Tia's 2nd week aboard the Enterprise. The production of 'Henry V' referred to is from 'Casting Call', which took place about 6 months 'ago'.

Rating: PG

Note: This story is dedicated to Kellie Waymire, who portrayed Crewwoman Elizabeth Cutler. She passed away on November 13, 2003, when this story was in its first draft.

Small Time

by JMK758

Introduction

About the only thing that had grown to be 'normal' in the almost three weeks that Tia had been aboard the Enterprise was her recent morning breakfasts with Hoshi Sato and Elizabeth Cutler, her friend and co-worker in the Biology department. She looked forward to seeing them each day not only for the chance at companionship, but for their invaluable aid in interpreting for her the frequently unintelligible tangle of human relations that she encountered each day.

They had become good friends, something she had precious little of in her former life, and she sensed they really did enjoy her company. She felt she could express herself without fearing she was going to be laughed at.

She had found, oddly enough, that that was her worst anticipation. She was trying so hard to fit in, and it was a vast relief that she could do so among such understanding new friends, who would not ridicule her for her efforts in abandoning the Universal Translator in favor of actually learning this monumentally confusing language, which could not keep even a definite article or negative tense in the 'correct' places.

So it was with some distress that she scanned the mess room from the open doorway, seeing neither of them. She really did want to talk this morning; there were many things that she had learned that had confused her immensely (these days that was no surprise at all) but usually an explanation from one of them sorted things out – a little.

There was, however, a familiar face in the room. She had never met the man, but had watched him last evening on her quarters' monitor, and had determined to meet him. Counting herself lucky, she crossed the room to where he sat.

The man, though seated, she knew would be taller than herself, no surprise since he was taller than Hoshi, who topped her by about two inches. He had brown hair and blue eyes, and though he did have a plate of scrambled eggs and sausage before him, he seemed more intent upon the contents of the padd in his hand. "Apolo – I mean ... Forgive me? Lieutenant O-Cay-ten?"

The man looked up in mild surprise, smiling when he saw her. "O'Cathain." He corrected mildly, pronouncing it 'O-ka-tain', having hit the accent on the end. "Aye, top of the morning to you. What may I do for you?"

Seamus O'Cathain, the ship's Astrogator, regarded the young woman. He knew who she was; there was no one on the ship who did not know of their new passenger, and he had heard much about her from Hoshi Sato, but he had not yet met the 'golden girl'. Now that he had, he regarded the description to be quite appropriate.

She was an Auran, whose particular distinction, aside from being a former slave 'rescued' by the Captain, came from her blood. Where human blood was based upon iron, Auran blood was based upon gold, which carried oxygen through her body in a manner he figured only Phlox would comprehend, since to him it seemed to defy what he knew of the metal or of biology. Apparently, some atom bonded well both the gold and oxygen, taking the life giving atom on a ride with it through the bloodstream. But it did serve to give the golden pigment to her skin, long hair more golden than blonde and golden eyes. She was not wearing a uniform, not being part of Starfleet, but wore a white blouse and blue skirt. She did not look 'dipped in gold' as someone had described her, but quite natural and real, with a complexion California girls could only dream of, and would probably kill for.

He bit the thought back, remembering from the stories he had heard about her just how many of her race _had_ been killed for it!

But at the moment she was staring at him with an expression he could only interpret as monumental confusion. "Beggin' your pardon, lass, but are you feeling all right?" He asked, his strong Irish brogue even more pronounced in his concern.

"Lieutenant _Seamus_ O'Cathain?"

"Aye, you've got me. Would you care to be sittin' down?" She shook her head sharply, as if trying to clear ... something ... from it, and took the offered seat. "Now, what can I do for you, lass?"

"Apologize do I. Confused I am." She smiled in self-awareness. "Always confused I am." As he set the padd he held down upon the table, she pulled from the pocket of her skirt an identical one. "This gave me Hoshi."

It took a moment for him to work out what she was saying, until he realized that her lips were indeed moving with her words. She was speaking English but with a very scrambled syntax. "Is something wrong with the Universal Translator?"

"I off tur – I turned it off. A ralyas ... a 'crutch' it is. Is Hoshi me teaching to without it speak. But a dictionary link she created, use I as reference just it"

"Ah."

"To her I speak you of. But what you are expect I do not. You sound what you did last night not."

"I beg your pardon?" He was becoming more and more adrift trying to follow her. She picked up the padd and punched several controls. She looked up in confusion.

"You do me insult not." He held up his hands defensively.

"Wait. Let's start over. Why did you come to me?"

"Spoke I to several men. Watched you last night. Said they did you teach me how to..." She looked again at the padd. "...behave would. But how you sound then you do not."

"Teach you to behave?" Confusion was starting to mingle with apprehension.

"Hoshi said you cultured ... taught her."

Seamus felt the conversation getting further and further out of his control. 'Watched me last ...' He thought, sincerely hoping he had not been doing anything embarrassing.

"Hoshi said you taught her..." She punched in another set of commands. "...how to act."

The clouds parted. "Ah! I see! 'Henry the Fifth'! You watched the video of that play we did!"

"Yes. Elizabeth said 'drama teaches the human condition'. But confusing it was. You were like you are not. Even sound the same you do not."

"I was playing an English King from hundreds of years ago. Tia, look... I may call you Tia, may I?"

"My name it is. Call me what else would you?" He held up his hands defensively.

"Never mind. Listen, Shakespeare's plays are a wonderful way for humans to explore the human condition, but they are definitely not meant to be a guide, especially to someone who does not have a firmly grounded understanding of humanity. Now I could recommend any number of modern plays, books and films, but I think you had better stick to real life."

"Then would you to behave ... _act_ teach me not?"

"Oh, I will, in time. But it takes a lot of discipline. I can think of dozens of roles you're perfect for, but for now ... for now ..." He saw the door open across the room. "For now, I am very glad to see Ensign Sato!"

As Tia looked back over her shoulder to the door, Seamus signaled to Hoshi, Crewwoman Elizabeth Cutler and Lieutenant Malcolm Reed to join them. His signal was very urgent indeed. When the trio joined them at the table, Seamus was vastly relieved. He'd let Hoshi handle the translating and he could sit back and relax.

As they settled themselves about the table, Hoshi gave Seamus a discreet kiss on the cheek. "How are you feeling?"

"Like a dog!" He told her emphatically. "They are really plaguing me down below." Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Tia Anlor snatch up her padd and press the controls rapidly.

"Did you turn the UT off again?" Hoshi asked her with mild reproof. She nodded, not looking up from her research. She was working the controls intently. Hoshi turned back to Seamus. "We have an agreement. When she does this; no slang. We stick to strict English."

"Okey dokey." Hoshi slapped his arm, but gave up on the irrepressible officer, turning her attention to Tia, who seemed to have found what she had been so urgently searching for.

"So, did you find what you wanted?"

She regarded them with a satisfied smile, feeling well armed to hold up her end of the conversation. "Lieutenant O'Cathain agreed to discipline me has, to behave teach me." She set the padd down. "I am to be his bitch."

She could not understand why Lt. Reed and Elizabeth Cutler looked stunned, why Hoshi turned to Lt. O'Cathain with shock mingled with fury, or why Lt. O'Cathain looked at her with such an expression of horror.


	2. Tumult

Chapter Two

Tumult

"NO!" O'Cathain exclaimed. "I didn't!"

"Then why did she -?"

"She wanted me to teach her to _act_! Like in 'Henry the Fifth'!"

Hoshi turned on the startled Auran. "Is this true?!"

"True it is." She said with an innocent nod, not able to understand Hoshi's anger. "Anston ... Apologize. Sorry I am. 'Act' and 'behave' I confuse, but said he that 'it takes discipline'."

"And the 'bitch'?" She demanded of O'Cathain in white fury. If he was taking advantage – but no, he would never do that!

"I don't know! I swear!"

"Says that here it does." Tia explained, turning the padd around and pointing to the reference. "Said he did he 'a dog' is. Says it right here does: 'a female dog'."

The table was utterly silent, but then Malcolm could not control himself any longer, and burst out in laughter. The more he tried to contain his mirth at Seamus' distress, the harder it became. But then he felt a foot under the table nudge his leg, hard. He regained enough control to look at them. The expressions on the faces of his shipmates were reproving, but Tia's was utterly stricken. She stared at him, tears glistening in her golden eyes.

"Know I English do not..." she gasped, tears trailing slowly down her cheeks as she fought desperately for control she could not get. "...know I your culture do not..." her expression crumpled. "...but know when a gisnart ... a _fool_ made of me I do!" She got up and hurried out of the room. Hoshi stood up, leaning over the table toward him.

"We had another deal, remember? _No laughing at her_!" She stalked out of the room, hoping that she could find the young Auran.

Malcolm looked at his two remaining friends. "I'm sorry!" Their expressions did not soften. "I am!"

"We're not the ones you have to say it to."

---

Captain Jonathan Archer stepped off the turbo onto deck 6 and paused in surprise. Of all the shipboard sounds he had grown used to over the past year; barely muted sobbing was not one of them. Concerned, he followed the easy trail to the juncture of the next corridor. As he turned the corner, his surprise was intensified as he saw their new Biologist standing several feet away, clad in white blouse and blue skirt, her back to him, weeping. "Miss Anlor?"

She turned, startled, and tried to pull herself together. "Miss Captain! I – I ..." She dissolved again, turning from him, unable to regain her control. He approached her, stepping around to face her.

"What is -?" He was completely astonished when she threw her arms around him and pressed her face to his chest, sobbing brokenly. It was in that position, the young Auran clinging to him, crying as through her heart had shattered, that Hoshi Sato found them when she turned the corner, following the trail.

"Tia?"

"Away stay!" She cried into Archer's chest, clinging more tightly to him. Archer waved her back, and she retreated to the far wall. He held Tia gently, patting her back, not trying to press her. "Trying am I!" She sobbed. "Grishnik...Stupid am I not! Stubborn, yes, but _stupid not_! Why did he -?" She couldn't continue, unable to endure the misery.

"Miss Anlor..." He began softly, "May I turn on the UT?" Normally he would not ask, but he felt sure that it was somewhere at the heart of this display. She nodded, and he glanced meaningfully at Hoshi.

She had been carrying her own UT, and keyed in the activation command, giving the Captain a brief nod. He waited patiently while she clung to him for her to cry herself out. "Now, Miss Anlor, please tell me what's wrong."

"I have been trying to learn English..." She began, and he could see from the movement of her lips that she had reverted to her native Auran, while the device instantly translated her words. He doubted privately if he would ever get used to the effect. "...so that I may be understood if I leave the Enterprise."

"I know."

"I get things wrong. A lot. I keep trying, but Lieutenant Reed - ." She stopped, unable to continue, barely clinging to her control.

"If I may, sir?" He nodded. "We misinterpreted something she said, which seemed to imply an ... inappropriate situation. When we understood, it was very funny. We had agreed never to laugh at her, but Malcolm could not help himself."

"I do not want you agreeing not to laugh at me!" Tia said tightly. "I know I am making mistakes, but I am not an idiot!"

"No one said you were. You misunderstand. He was not laughing at _you_; he was laughing at Seamus."

"And is that any better?" Hoshi thought about it.

"No, I don't suppose it is." She stepped closer. "Tia, we do respect you. Barely one person in a trillion could do what you have done; take a language you have heard for only a few days, and become almost fluent in it."

"You can."

She shrugged. "I'm the other person. Most cannot."

"On Aura, anyone could." Hoshi looked at Archer in surprise at this simple declaration of fact. "It is nothing special."

"Believe me, among humans it is something special." She smiled. "You could put me out of a job."

"I do not want to put you out of a job! I like biology! I thought I was contributing something ..." she paused to consider, "...and I suppose I did over-react a bit when Lieutenant Reed laughed."

"Sometimes, when we put so much into trying so hard, we become very sensitive."

"So." Archer began. "Better?" Tia reached out for the UT, taking it from Hoshi and turning it off. She smiled up at him.

"Better, miss Captain."

"Er, about that..."


	3. Dissemblance

Chapter Three

Dissemblance

"So..." Hoshi began as they walked down the corridor. She had considered returning to the galley, but decided not to press her luck, at least until she was sure that Tia's control was back. Breakfast could wait a bit. "Aurans can learn languages as fast as I can?"

"That why is ask you to teach me English I did. Knew learn it I could."

"Well, I knew you could too, but I didn't think two weeks would do it." But then Tia looked at her apprehensively.

"Hoshi, if ask you something, will angry it make you?"

"Never." Tia shook her head.

"Did it already. Say 'never' do not, when angry you were." Hoshi stopped. The girl deserved a more honest answer.

"I'm sorry. I promise, I will try not to be angry. Ask."

"Why were you angry? When Lt. O'Cathain a 'dog' described himself, clear it seemed that if he to act teach me, a female 'dog' be I. Why angry did that make you?"

"You really do ask tough questions."

"Sorry am I, but if..." Hoshi held up her hand.

"Don't be. It's not your question, but I have a feeling the answer is going to give me a migraine."

Tia looked at her, completely perplexed. She was about to say something, but gasped, wincing, her hand going to her chest.

"Ohhh. Understand do I why hurting I am, but why the question affect you should?" Seizing on the opportunity to derail the train, Hoshi asked:

"You're in pain?" She nodded. Further, seeing that having made the admission she did not have to maintain any appearance, she leaned against the bulkhead, her face showing clearly her distress. She hugged her arms tightly across her chest. "What's wrong?" Tia shook her head. Eyes closed, she still refused to give in. "Tell me." She clenched her hands, her whole body tense as she leaned against the bulkhead.

"No." She gasped, surprising her friend. She winced sharply, her eyes clenching with the pain, her left hand moving from her chest to her abdomen.

"Well, if you won't tell me, at least tell me this. Has it been hurting long?"

"Since ... ahhhhh! Since morning."

"At least tell me what hurts." The pain she was feeling was clear in her expression, and she tried to keep upright, her back against the bulkhead, trying not to double over. An instant later she drew off the wall, one hand flashing to her lower back as a spasm of pain ripped through her.

"Nggggg! Ask what hurts not." She whispered tightly. "Shorter the list is!" Hoshi took her arm.

"Come on, I'll take you to the Infirmary." Tia shook her head more determinedly.

"No. Will not." She leaned back against the bulkhead. "Know what it I do is. For it Phlox may do nothing."

"But -."

"Will speak of it not!" She said sharply, tugging her arm out of Hoshi's grasp. She clutched herself tightly, her fingers digging so hard into her arms that the flesh of her arms started to turn yellow from lack of circulation. A moment later her legs started to give out as the muscles in her thighs cramped. She tried to hold her legs, barely able to stand, and then cried out as a sharp pain to her lower back snapped her upright, almost falling against the bulkhead.

She grasped her arms and held herself tightly, her breath stopped, eyes clenched, wrapped in concentration, seemingly shutting out everything. For a long moment she stood like this. Then, finally, Tia collapsed, sagging against the bulkhead, completely limp. She took several more, easier breaths, and then looked up at Hoshi, a bright smile upon her face. "All right it is." She said happily, pushing herself off the wall.

"What do you mean, it's all right?" Tia stepped away from the wall, perfectly at ease as Hoshi stared at her, astonished.

"Pain there is not."

"What do you mean 'pain there is not'? I can see how you were suffering!"

"Suffering am I not," she assured her with a smile, "but between us I ask you to keep it."

"Keep what?!" Tia paused, reconsidering.

"Maybe between us not. But anyway, fine I am."

It was a stunning change. In an instant she had gone from suffering to her normal pixyish manner, and did not look like she had a care in the cosmos. "May we to the galley return? Finish breakfast I would like before go to lab I must."

"Of course." Hoshi said flatly, feeling stunned. As they started down the corridor, she asked: "Tia, what the hell is going on?! You seem perfectly normal. At least normal for you. But a moment ago – have you had this problem long?"

"Long no. But worry do not." She favored her with a dazzling smile. "Know what it is I do."

"Then what _is_ it?"

"No thing." She said with airy dismissal as the galley door opened. Hoshi watched from the door as Tia strode into the room, the picture of contentment.

"And you said you needed Seamus to teach you how to act." She muttered.

---

Malcolm Reed looked at the golden girl as she approached, seemingly none the worse for her emotional retreat just minutes before. She strode lightly to the table, sat down and favored them all with a stunning smile. In fact, this time it was Hoshi, just approaching the table, that seemed apprehensive, about as much so as he did himself. "Tia, I'm sorry. I wasn't laughing at you."

Tia reached out, touching his arm. "Know I now that you were not. Hoshi me told everything. I am angry not. It was just ... passing." Hoshi knew that none of the others noticed that what was 'passing' was a twinge of pain the girl could not keep entirely out of her eyes. But she covered it well, relaxing into her chair.

"So, how are you getting on in Bio?"

She smiled. "Well. Elizabeth a good teacher is. Researching I am ... compare ... comparative physiology. Comparing human and Auran I am."

"Learn anything interesting?" Elizabeth asked, certain the answer would be yes.

"From start, much is different. First is obvious when looked ... human women hair above their genitalia have." Both women looked down or away, reddening slightly. "Wrong I say?" Hoshi nodded.

"Wrong you said." She agreed. "Remember what we discussed about wedsa?" She used the Auran word for 'private'. Now it was Tia who blushed, a bright gold, looking away, hiding her eyes.

"Sorry I am! Seems I say nothing can _not_." Her voice broke, and she seemed again on the edge of crying. She fought for control, and the more she did the more of the pain she was feeling slipped through into her expression.

Then, in an instant, it was gone, hidden behind a mask of control as if a switch had been thrown, and when she looked back she was as bright, as vivacious as ever. "To study the differences between our ... bodies, that interesting is. Much confusing is, but things improve."

"How so?" Reed asked. He caught Hoshi's eyes, and in his own he sent back the silent reply. He was no more fooled by her bright chatter than anyone else was.

"Your English, I can read it not. Speak it I may, but read it no. Hooked one of the technicians did an 'ai!'" She gave a sharp yip of pain, and just as quickly covered it up. "... audio circuit to the monitor, then to the UT, then to this." She pulled the padd out of the pocket of her skirt. "To me says it your ... Latin and your English." She turned it on, showing them the text it contained.

"'Gray's Anatomy' as an English primer." Liz quipped.

"Yes. Very different from Auran it is, but ...' The 'but' came about half an octave high, and her eyes clenched shut briefly, yet in a moment her voice was normal, and she continued as if nothing had happened. "...but much I learning am, with Elizabeth as my guide."

"I would say so." Seamus agreed.

"Oscar time, wouldn't you say?" Hoshi asked him.

"Haven't seen better."

Tia did not allow herself to pause long enough to wonder at the exchange.

---

After breakfast, the group split up. Malcolm and Seamus headed toward their respective posts, Elizabeth and Tia toward Biology and Hoshi, for whom her path to the Bridge was along the same initial route, went with them part of the way. "So, Tia, how are you feeling?" She asked pointedly.

"Perfect." The Auran responded brightly.

"Dissemblance doesn't become you." Tia looked at her, uncomprehendingly. She turned to Elizabeth on her right.

"She means you're lying." She turned back to Hoshi, affronted.

"Hoshi! I know what you say not!" Hoshi stopped, looking at her squarely.

"Don't give me that! You are _lying_. You are not 'perfect', you are not 'fine'. Now tell us the truth!" She turned again for help from her new friend and co-worker.

"I've known you only a few days, hon, and even I can tell you're lying. I'm not sure what about, but I can tell you that you didn't fool Malcolm or Seamus either." She looked between the two of them, her expression like that of a trapped animal.

"But ... but nothing wrong there is!" She insisted.

"Swear on what you hold most sacred!" Hoshi demanded. She looked up at the Asian linguist.

"No! Know what you ask you do not! My _friend_ I thought you were!"

"I _am_ your friend, darn it, and friends do not let friends hurt."

"But fine I am! Promise you I do!" They looked at her intently, probing but not breaking through. They knew she was lying, but they could not force her to tell them.

The silence dragged on.

And on.

Finally. "All right." Hoshi said levelly. "Whatever it is, we'll stop prying – if we have your word that it is not serious."

"Know what it is I do." She gave them a reassuring smile.

"That's not what I asked!" Tia looked between them, seeing one was as inflexible as the other.

"My word you have. Serious is it not."

"All right. Then let's go. We're all late."

They continued down the corridor, Tia perfectly at ease, confident and happy as she always appeared. But as they neared her quarters, which were on the way to the lab, she turned to Liz. "May I briefly stop? Something there I forget is."

"All right." As she turned to her door, the other two women paused. "I'll see you in a few minutes."

"Yes." Tia said brightly. She turned and entered as the door slid open before her. She strode in.

"I'll see you this evening." Hoshi called, signaling Liz. They both stepped silently into the room. Tia, her back to the door, did not see them.

"Yes. Tonight shall I see you!" She called back happily. They stepped apart, allowing the door to close between them.

Tia stood still for about five seconds, and then suddenly clutched herself with both arms as a spasm of pain shot through her, crying out as she fell to her knees with a sob. She knelt for several moments until another spasm of pain assaulted her and she doubled over, crying. She clamped one hand over her mouth to muffle a sharp scream. She tried to keep her voice low over the pain as she collapsed forward, barely catching herself on one hand. She cried in agonized misery, trying to muffle the sound, falling onto her side, curling up on the deck, clutching her body and sobbing brokenly.


	4. Dasreer

Chapter Four

Dasreer

"That did it." Hoshi declared as she reached down for Tia's arm. She took hold of the startled girl, who looked up at her in pain flooded astonishment.

"Hoshi?" She croaked.

"You're coming with us to the Infirmary." Surprisingly, the Auran yanked out of her grip, rolling away.

She got about a half a turn before she collided with Elizabeth's legs, and the woman reached down to the surprised girl and together they hauled her to her feet. "Come on, hon."

Tia shook her head sharply. "Please, no! Do not!" However, she did not stop clutching her stomach, seeming to have decided there was no point in more pretense. "There is need _not_!" The protest ended in a high pitched cry as at that moment another spasm of pain hit her. She doubled over, her knees buckled and the officers were left bearing her full weight.

"This is ridiculous!" Hoshi hauled the slighter woman upright, holding her steady and looking into her pained eyes. "You can't even stand, and you say 'there is need not'! You gave us your word!"

"Calrasdi! Trinas nyas – Understand not... about 'word'." She gasped. "Asked you for 'word', gave what you wanted."

"This isn't the time." Liz told her friend.

"Just go!" Tia gasped. "I all right ... will be!" Before either could answer, she clutched her chest, gasping in pain, her breath stolen. A moment later her hand clamped over her mouth to try to muffle a high scream and she bent backward as a spasm ripped through her back. She fell backward into their arms, clutching her chest, not breathing from the pain as she lay in the frightened women's arms. Hoshi knew from Trip that her heart was much lower in her chest, but... It took a few seconds for her to ease the pain enough to breathe again, her breath coming in a strangled, rasping gasp.

"We are going to the Infirmary!"

"Nyas!" Tia gasped sharply.

"You can either walk there or I will call Malcolm back and he will carry you!"

"NYAS!" Tia's reaction was astounding – she broke away from them with a cry of unbridled terror but got only one step before another blast of pain seared her body and she fell into the half couch beside them. "You can tell him not! He know must _not_!" She writhed in agony, trying to clutch every part of her body, an impossible feat that left the two women looking down at her in pity and distress. "Please!" She begged, groaning. "My _friends_ I thought you were!" Hoshi knelt on one knee beside her.

"Tia, it's because we're your friends that we want to help!"

"Help you can not!" She groaned, doubling over. "Only – only Aura can help!"

"Aura. You've said that before. Your planet? Your god? What?"

"Both – neither. On Aura there is –." Whatever she would have said was lost in a scream as she convulsed so powerfully she would have fallen off the couch had they not restrained her. It ended in a piteous sobbing. Hoshi clung to her, trying to keep her from hurting herself as the girl buried her face into her shoulder. "Thought it I could endure!" She cried against the linguist. "Thought it I could endure!" She broke down, weeping.

"Tia, you're scaring the _hell_ out of us!" Liz exclaimed. "Is this going to kill you?!" She shook her head, still sobbing. Suddenly a seizure more intense than ever took hold of her, and they clung to her as she screamed, the sound muffled in Hoshi's uniform. Her body was wracked so violently they could barely hold her upon the couch.

When it passed, she collapsed against Hoshi. "Tia, talk to us before it gets worse! Is this going to kill you?"

"Wish it would!" She sobbed. "Wish it would!"

"That's it; we're out of here!" She was about to haul Tia to her feet, but Liz grabbed her arm.

"I don't think she's going to make it." Glancing at the suffering girl, Hoshi had to agree. She stood up, crossing the room and reaching for the intercom panel, something she felt she should have done from the very beginning.

"Hoshi to Phlox."

"Phlox here," came the immediate response. Tia reached out to her imploringly, her eyes filled with terror.

"Qualsia! Please! No!" She gasped in absolute panic. "He must not!"

"Medical emergency; Tia Anlor's quarters." She forced herself off the couch with a desperate terror, brushing Elizabeth off.

"No! Please! Away keep him! Away send h-!" Every muscle in her body seemed to seize at once and she shrieked, almost crashing to the floor if they had not caught her, and she collapsed into their arms. Phlox's 'on my way' was completely drowned out.

---

In the Infirmary Phlox had been working on his patient for about three minutes after having issued the completely unprecedented order for a technician to actually lock the matter transporter onto both himself and the girl and transfer them both to that facility. Hoshi and Liz, having been unceremoniously left behind, caused their own stir barreling down the corridors to get there the long way.

They had arrived in time to help hold her onto a diagnostic bed so that he could examine her. Their efforts at restraint were equal parts keeping her from hurting herself more in falling off when the seizures, which seemed to be growing in severity, struck; as well as to keep her from fleeing.

She spent most of her efforts begging him not to examine her, pleading with them to let her leave, until finally he selected what his scans indicated would be a safe sedative to give her. As he pressed it to her neck, and the liquid entered her bloodstream, the two women wondered which he had done it for more; to save her from further pain or to keep her from begging anymore.

Gradually she started to calm, her movements growing slower, more languid. Her voice fell to a whisper, but she never stopped pleading with them to let her go until she was asleep.

"I've had recalcitrant patients before, but this is extreme."

"She is a person of extremes." Hoshi agreed.

"Do you know what's wrong?" Liz asked. He gave her a weary smile.

"I haven't even been able to begin an examination. I'm just happy to get her sedated." He picked up a scanner, passing it over the unconscious girl's body. "I'll let you know what I find."

---

Not willing to be dismissed, the pair backed off a few feet and waited. They watched Phlox perform several scans with various pieces of equipment, view the results of various tests upon screens which showed full color images of her internal organs, and ultimately press another injection into her, this time over her abdomen. Then he turned to them. "What can you tell me about her symptoms?"

They gave a concise report of everything they had observed, from her emotional breakdown in the galley and corridor, the attacks in the corridor that she had tried so urgently to cover up through the climactic seizures in her quarters. "Do you know what's wrong?" Hoshi finally demanded.

"I think I do. Of course, I will have to do a few more tests. We know too little about her biology, but I think I do." He clearly left it at that.

"Well?!!"

"I believe Doctor/Patient confidentiality applies here."

"She's our friend!" Liz exclaimed.

"I realize that, but I believe it would be unethical for me to tell what I've found without consulting first with my patient."

His manner was courteous, polite and completely adamant.

---

When Tia Anlor got her eyes open she felt lightheaded, disassociated and pain free. The last was such a blessing that she sighed deeply.

"I've given you aboulatol for the pain." She looked to her right, finding the towering body of the Denobulan doctor beside her. She ran a hand up the length of her body, feeling sensation but no pain. "How do you feel?" She looked up at him curiously; his lips did not match his words, but he was speaking perfect Auran! She thought she was still partially sedated, had to be dreaming. He nodded his head, understanding. "I'm speaking Denobulan; you may speak in Auran if you wish. This is a closed link; no one outside this room may hear and understand us. While the humans could break what we are saying they would not do so; it would be completely against their ethics. This is as close to complete confidentiality as we could ask."

"I thought it was over." She said, her words rendered to him in fluent Denobulan.

"Not quite. Your ... what do you call it?"

"Dasreer!" She said it with a hateful tone. The computer, having noted Phlox's desire, rendered it in Auran. "In English, it would mean 'small death'."

"Appropriate. Well, your dasreer has yet to run its course, but it may do so in here with no unnecessary pain." She turned away, her voice filled with grief.

"There must be pain."

"Why?" She turned back in real surprise, and seemed about to answer, but then turned away again.

"I must not speak of it."

"Don't be ridiculous, I'm a doctor. I've probably figured out most of it just by examining you."

"And if I asked you to give me back the pain?"

"I'd ask you 'how much?'" She looked up at him, curiously.

"A human doctor would refuse." She had learned that much at least.

"I'm not human. How much pain?" She let her head fall back.

"All of it."

"No."

"I knew you would refuse."

"I'm not human, but there are certain ethical standards that are universal. Unless you specifically refuse my help, I will determine the best course of your treatment. If your cultural beliefs state there must be discomfort, you will be given a measure of it, but the suffering you were enduring was unacceptable." She looked up at him bitterly.

"How do you know what is 'unacceptable'?"

"In here it is what I say it is. You expressed to Hoshi Sato a desire that this dasreer kill you."

"I was out of my mind."

"And are you lucid now?"

"Yes."

"Then what?" She was quiet for a long time. Finally;

"Half." He considered for a few moments, and then selected a hypospray, filling it with a compound. He injected it into her arm, and then started to bind straps across her body. She looked up at him in concern.

"Your dasreer is well advanced. I do not consider your request sensible, and furthermore I will not permit you to harm yourself any more than you have, but I will give you what treatment you think you want."

"What I think I want?"

"Patients make the worst doctors." He told her with a small smile she did not understand. She was about to ask when a sharp pain in her arm caused her to gasp.

"I had not realized it was so far advanced!"

"You may want to reconsider."

"No. I can endure this." She winced again, groaning as the pain spread through her chest.

"Your 'small death' seems nothing to be pleased with."

"Believe me, I am not!" She groaned; straining at the restraints until the pain gradually eased. "But I have to endure this."

"Again I ask, why?"

"Because I am alone. I escaped from home, but was not alone. My friends are dead, the only ones who could have helped, but I am alone. There is no one to ease this, and no one can ever be told!" She stiffened, gasping as the pain shot through her body.

"There have been times that I marveled at the 'sense' of humans in dealing with illness; but you far exceed them."

"Both you and Hoshi described me as a person of extremes." He looked chagrined.

"I wasn't aware you were conscious."

"Just fading."

"Then perhaps you'll satisfy my curiosity. Why did you keep this from Hoshi and Liz. They only wanted to help." She gasped as the pain grew.

"They cannot help."

"You're too intelligent to behave so densely. You know what I mean."

"I cannot tell them. We do not discuss it, even among ourselves!"

"So you just suffer in silence."

She stiffened as a spasm shot through her, crying out, almost a scream, straining against the straps, and it was several seconds before her body relaxed again and she could regain her breath. "Ahhh! Believe me, Doctor, aarrgghh, there is nothing silent about it!"

"But why must you suffer? On your world they must have found out long ago how to ease the symptoms."

"Hundr – ohh – hundreds of years ago they eased everything. No pain, no cramps, no spasms ... ahhhh! We must suffer!" A seizure racked her body and she strained against the straps holding her in place. He waited until it passed, his heart going out to her.

"Why? Why must you suffer?!"

"Because – because we –." She cried out loudly as a severe spasm took hold of her. When finally it eased, it left her gasping. "Because we ... ohhh ... we _kill_! We must ... aaiiiieeee!" She screamed, head flung back, tearing at the restraints. When it finally passed, she was left weak and panting. "We kill – and we are to give life! We fail, and we must suf –." She screamed shrilly, tearing at the straps, shrieking on and on until, unwilling to let it continue, he picked up the hypospray.

He looked down at her as she writhed about on the biobed, straining at the straps, ready to use the hypo, trying to understand her. Finally, with deep regret, he put it back on the table and turned away, leaving the screaming girl.

---

"Thank you for not doing it." She told him an hour later, when the dasreer had run its short course, and she could sit up. Her golden hair was plastered to her face, her clothing clinging to her moist body. The marks of the straps, loosely bound but dug with extreme force into her flesh by her own efforts, would take time to fade. There had been blood, in measure, but even this had passed.

"I think you made a terrible mistake, but I was bound to honor your wishes. I hope you will reconsider in the future."

"I do not have a choice. There are no Aurans to help me."

"There are alternatives." She shook her head.

"Not for an Auran. I may have left my planet, I may have come to this ship and all it entails, but I am Auran. I must follow the way of my world."

"And is there anything else I should know about what to expect from your practices and cultural imperatives?" She paused, considering.

"I am not sure. But I think we will find out."

Epilogue

An hour later, when Ensign Hoshi Sato and Crewwoman Elizabeth Cutler entered the Infirmary, Phlox was waiting for them. Not ready, he thought, but waiting.

"We're here to see..."

"Yes, I was expecting you."

"Where is she?"

"In her quarters; resting. It was a stressful experience."

"What was wrong with her?" It was a question Phlox had not been looking forward to.

"I had been considering over the past hour whether or not to tell you. You understand, there are ethical questions involved. She has asked me not to tell anyone."

"But we're her friends!"

"I know, and she will need your help next time."

"You mean this is going to happen _again_?!"

"I should think it will do so on a regular schedule, roughly each third of a year or more; I should think some eighteen or so weeks apart. If she will not accept my help, perhaps she will accept yours. Perhaps you can at least convince her to accept treatment. She believes ... her people believe ... she is obligated to preserve and promote life, and her suffering is her penalty for failure."

"Failure?!" Hoshi exclaimed. "What failure?"

"Will you just _tell_ us what is wrong with her?!" Liz demanded, frustrated.

"I should think you would both know, as you are both very familiar with it, though the difference between you and her is that because of her physiology her ... distress ... is compressed into four hours, rather than several days."

Hoshi gaped at him. "Are you telling us she had her _period_?" She demanded, incredulous.

"I should think in her case that it would be more aptly described as an exclamation point."


End file.
